#1 The Taste A Lie Leaves In My Mouth
Yeah I Lie. Seldom. I am not good at it and I don't like the taste a lie leaves in my mouth. Maybe I should try it more often.
Submitted Anonymously.
#2 A Terrifying Philosophy Of Life
To avoid yet one more lie, I’d have to answer, “Yes.” I lie. And I guess I’d say that anyone who claims not to is...well... a liar.
I think I’m fairly typical in that I justify most of my lying by concocting all sorts of interesting stories and excuses for my fabrications (lying to myself about my lies?).
As a counselor, I’m aware that were it not for the universal penchant for lying, I’d have a hard time making a living. Some form of deception is almost always at the heart of the dilemmas people bring in to my office. Let’s face it, “the truth shall set you free” might make for a nice bumper sticker, but it is a terrifying philosophy of life.
Submitted by Wesley M. Eades, Ph.D. Visit his blog - Practical Spirituality
#3 Not Worth The Fight
Tennessee William's wrote that "mendacity is a system we live in." I tend to agree, but I also try not to be a part of the system to the extent that I can.
We all lie. I lie when I want to spare someone’s feelings or when it’s not worth the fight it would cause to tell the absolute truth. Some might say this makes me a dishonest person. I don’t think that it does to the extent that those lies do not amount to me sacrificing my integrity or causing others harm. Being honest, to me, is being truthful to yourself and the understanding you have with those closest to you. Staying on those ideals keeps me from becoming a part of the system.
Submitted by Amanda Rogers, Esq. Visit her Facebook Profile.
#4 A Naked-Looking Suit To Fool Me
Expected dishonesty....this could refer to a lot of things, but I will address the "white lies" told to children.
When I was a child, I imagined that everything was a set-up. I thought that I was the only little girl who was naked under her clothes and that everyone else was wearing a naked-looking suit to fool me. I thought that my Father was a very rich man who had paid off the world around me to keep quiet about how there really wasn't a God. And when I asked my dad what a hickey was, and he told me, I didn't believe him until I confirmed it with a 5th grade friend.
For whatever reason, I was naturally suspicious that others, specifically my parents, were out to fool me.
If my parents had convinced me, as a small child, of a fat guy with a white beard who gives me gifts at Christmastime, only to reveal to me years later that it was all a big story, I think that I would never have trusted them with the really big stuff. I would have never learned to value the truth, and it is questionable whether I would, today, believe in God.
To me, there is no such thing as a "white lie." And I am really thankful that my parents chose to ALWAYS tell me the truth.
Submitted by Beth Rogers. Visit her blog - Veritable Observations.
#5 Oh, Wait…I Just Lied!
I never lie…oh wait, I just lied! :)
For those who know me, I have a hard time lying. Sometimes, in the excitement of sharing an anecdote, I add or change a detail to enhance the story, but it is not true. Immediately after it comes out of my mouth, I stop and say, “Oh, wait. I just lied.” Then I continue with my story without any falsified additions.
One of my favorite TV shows is House, M.D. Two quotes made famous by the main character, Dr. Gregory House, are: “Everybody lies” and “Truth begins in lies.” I find these statements to be both true and profound.
So what is truth?
Postmodernism defines truth as a subjective construct associated only to the individual who held it. This concept allows for the existence of many equally valid truths, yet the idea of an absolute truth is undeniably rejected. So how then, if all truths are equal and valid, can any truth, even absolute truth, be rejected?
And the pendulum swings…
Fundamentalism (in any faith) upholds the belief of understanding and enforcing “absolute truth” upon all people. Only when one fundamentalist faith recognizes another fundamentalist faith enforcing their truth upon the world do they understand the dangerousness of this practice.
We must find the balance. We must live in the balance. We must live in the tension of the pendulum swings, and this is where we will find truth. Otherwise, truth is held hostage and confined to human definition; or truth is relative. And “if truth is relative, it’s impossible to lie” (Gene Edward Veith).
Submitted by Brandi Buchanan, M.Div. Visit her blog – The Living Witness.
#6 I Call It A Disease
“I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation”, quotes Fox Mulder. Everybody lies and yes, I too am in that pool of liars. As much as I detest this fact, saying that I do not lie would in itself be a Big Fat Lie!
Lying - as immoral as it may be - is a natural force of habit humans, collectively, exhibit in their social realm. It is so natural that for some liars, it’s hard to decipher truth from untruth, because the lies have somehow managed to become their individual truths.
Even the society we live in lies too. In fact, society imposes lies on people and people themselves impose lies on society. The viscous circle is unending. We thrive on such immoral behaviors and after doing it for so long with out consciously thinking about it, we become numb to the values of truthfulness. Take for example our current world economy. How did we get here one would ask? Well, it all starts with those little “white lies that spin out of control and turn into big, bad monster lies. In this mix, we also find greed, and deception, which are all first cousins of the word “lies.”
Truth, although hard to find, keeps us all on the straight and narrow path. Individuals that are masterminds of lying have definitely trailed off this narrow pathway and can’t distinguish truth from lies anymore especially when the lies they tell seem to dominate and even extinguish any truth that they may have originally possessed within. Because I have lived and witnessed this type of lying, this topic is all too real to me A close family member is afflicted with this disease of lying and has been labeled a compulsive liar. I call it a disease because at this compulsive stage of lying, anyone that tells a lie for no just cause and uses a lie to cover up that lie and on and on just for the sake of lying has some real major issues and at some point loses all senses of self and thus can not be trusted with much.
To end, I leave with a quote from an African proverb that states, “The end of an ox is beef, and the end of a lie is grief!”
Submitted by Kristine Ogbolu.
Yeah I Lie. Seldom. I am not good at it and I don't like the taste a lie leaves in my mouth. Maybe I should try it more often.
Submitted Anonymously.
#2 A Terrifying Philosophy Of Life
To avoid yet one more lie, I’d have to answer, “Yes.” I lie. And I guess I’d say that anyone who claims not to is...well... a liar.
I think I’m fairly typical in that I justify most of my lying by concocting all sorts of interesting stories and excuses for my fabrications (lying to myself about my lies?).
As a counselor, I’m aware that were it not for the universal penchant for lying, I’d have a hard time making a living. Some form of deception is almost always at the heart of the dilemmas people bring in to my office. Let’s face it, “the truth shall set you free” might make for a nice bumper sticker, but it is a terrifying philosophy of life.
Submitted by Wesley M. Eades, Ph.D. Visit his blog - Practical Spirituality
#3 Not Worth The Fight
Tennessee William's wrote that "mendacity is a system we live in." I tend to agree, but I also try not to be a part of the system to the extent that I can.
We all lie. I lie when I want to spare someone’s feelings or when it’s not worth the fight it would cause to tell the absolute truth. Some might say this makes me a dishonest person. I don’t think that it does to the extent that those lies do not amount to me sacrificing my integrity or causing others harm. Being honest, to me, is being truthful to yourself and the understanding you have with those closest to you. Staying on those ideals keeps me from becoming a part of the system.
Submitted by Amanda Rogers, Esq. Visit her Facebook Profile.
#4 A Naked-Looking Suit To Fool Me
Expected dishonesty....this could refer to a lot of things, but I will address the "white lies" told to children.
When I was a child, I imagined that everything was a set-up. I thought that I was the only little girl who was naked under her clothes and that everyone else was wearing a naked-looking suit to fool me. I thought that my Father was a very rich man who had paid off the world around me to keep quiet about how there really wasn't a God. And when I asked my dad what a hickey was, and he told me, I didn't believe him until I confirmed it with a 5th grade friend.
For whatever reason, I was naturally suspicious that others, specifically my parents, were out to fool me.
If my parents had convinced me, as a small child, of a fat guy with a white beard who gives me gifts at Christmastime, only to reveal to me years later that it was all a big story, I think that I would never have trusted them with the really big stuff. I would have never learned to value the truth, and it is questionable whether I would, today, believe in God.
To me, there is no such thing as a "white lie." And I am really thankful that my parents chose to ALWAYS tell me the truth.
Submitted by Beth Rogers. Visit her blog - Veritable Observations.
#5 Oh, Wait…I Just Lied!
I never lie…oh wait, I just lied! :)
For those who know me, I have a hard time lying. Sometimes, in the excitement of sharing an anecdote, I add or change a detail to enhance the story, but it is not true. Immediately after it comes out of my mouth, I stop and say, “Oh, wait. I just lied.” Then I continue with my story without any falsified additions.
One of my favorite TV shows is House, M.D. Two quotes made famous by the main character, Dr. Gregory House, are: “Everybody lies” and “Truth begins in lies.” I find these statements to be both true and profound.
So what is truth?
Postmodernism defines truth as a subjective construct associated only to the individual who held it. This concept allows for the existence of many equally valid truths, yet the idea of an absolute truth is undeniably rejected. So how then, if all truths are equal and valid, can any truth, even absolute truth, be rejected?
And the pendulum swings…
Fundamentalism (in any faith) upholds the belief of understanding and enforcing “absolute truth” upon all people. Only when one fundamentalist faith recognizes another fundamentalist faith enforcing their truth upon the world do they understand the dangerousness of this practice.
We must find the balance. We must live in the balance. We must live in the tension of the pendulum swings, and this is where we will find truth. Otherwise, truth is held hostage and confined to human definition; or truth is relative. And “if truth is relative, it’s impossible to lie” (Gene Edward Veith).
Submitted by Brandi Buchanan, M.Div. Visit her blog – The Living Witness.
#6 I Call It A Disease
“I would never lie. I willfully participate in a campaign of misinformation”, quotes Fox Mulder. Everybody lies and yes, I too am in that pool of liars. As much as I detest this fact, saying that I do not lie would in itself be a Big Fat Lie!
Lying - as immoral as it may be - is a natural force of habit humans, collectively, exhibit in their social realm. It is so natural that for some liars, it’s hard to decipher truth from untruth, because the lies have somehow managed to become their individual truths.
Even the society we live in lies too. In fact, society imposes lies on people and people themselves impose lies on society. The viscous circle is unending. We thrive on such immoral behaviors and after doing it for so long with out consciously thinking about it, we become numb to the values of truthfulness. Take for example our current world economy. How did we get here one would ask? Well, it all starts with those little “white lies that spin out of control and turn into big, bad monster lies. In this mix, we also find greed, and deception, which are all first cousins of the word “lies.”
Truth, although hard to find, keeps us all on the straight and narrow path. Individuals that are masterminds of lying have definitely trailed off this narrow pathway and can’t distinguish truth from lies anymore especially when the lies they tell seem to dominate and even extinguish any truth that they may have originally possessed within. Because I have lived and witnessed this type of lying, this topic is all too real to me A close family member is afflicted with this disease of lying and has been labeled a compulsive liar. I call it a disease because at this compulsive stage of lying, anyone that tells a lie for no just cause and uses a lie to cover up that lie and on and on just for the sake of lying has some real major issues and at some point loses all senses of self and thus can not be trusted with much.
To end, I leave with a quote from an African proverb that states, “The end of an ox is beef, and the end of a lie is grief!”
Submitted by Kristine Ogbolu.
As a "House M.D." fan myself, I agree with Brandi. Everybody lies! We all justify the reasons why we do it, or maybe we just do it because we are human and it is programmed into us from the moment we come into this world. The point is that, society will categorically reject any person who never tells a lie. The irony of Gregory House's character, is that although he is a proclaimed Atheist, he actually more "Christian" than most Christians. If the image of his calloused character repulses you...then (my self-deceiving friends) you are staring "absolute truth" straight in the eye. The reality is that "truth" is not pretty to look at. It is harsh, cold, unforgiving, and most of all...inhuman.
ReplyDeleteWebster's defines the word "Inhuman" as: Cold, impersonal, lacking pity, kindness, or mercy.
"Truth" in it's purest form is all of these things and much more. As humans, we are incapable of truth. As humans, we are all naturally...liars.
Ed Edwards did NOT write this comment! ;-)
So it seems we all agree that everyone lies. But do we agree that lying is wrong? Everyone does it, but is it okay? Is it okay always, sometimes, rarely, never? Even if it serves "good" purposes at times, is the lie itself morally acceptable?
ReplyDeleteI would love to say lying is always wrong, but then I'm perplexed by the Nazi scenario (an adaptation of a scenario presented by Immanuel Kant): If you lived in Nazi Germany and you were hiding a Jewish family in your house, would you lie if a Nazi officer asked you if a Jewish family was residing in your home?
Francis Beckwith, a Baylor professor, explained that it's not okay to lie unless another moral imperative takes priority over the moral imperative to not lie. For instance, in the Nazi situation, saving lives is the moral imperative that takes priority over the moral imperative to not lie.
Thus, we can maintain that there is such a thing as absolute truth, but there is a hierarchy of moral imperatives. In other words, lying is wrong (absolute truth), letting an innocent person die is wrong if you can help it (absolute truth), but both of these cannot be achieved at once, one wins out.
-Amanda Stevens
To Amanda: Your deductive logic is very helpful. I take it a step further...Does the exsistence of Absolute Truth support the practice of Situational Ethics? Ewww!
ReplyDeleteTo Anonymously NOT Ed Edwards: Do you think House would be any happier if he started lying to people? Even more, does lying make us happy and telling the truth make us sad?
In regard to House, M.D., saying that he is more Christian is quite a stretch, QUITE a stretch. The statement that blatant truth can seem cold and harsh, i agree with. That doesn't, by any means, make Dr. House a Christian. But that's not really what we're supposed to be discussing here.
ReplyDeleteWhat Amanda said really has me thinking. And i'm afraid i can't reconcile that dilemma yet. Although Biblically, i can't deny the legitimacy of that argument since Rahab and her family's lives were saved by her act of lying to officials to save the lives of the Hebrew spies.
I agree with the writer who is NOT Ed Edwards that being totally truthful can be the most damaging act in many social situations. We can lie simply in voice inflection. Therefore, Dr. House's character shows us how it would be if we truly spoke everything we thought without any regard to the person to whom we were speaking. Ugly, huh? But what is beautiful is that when House is kind or shows compassion, it is genuine. Therefore, with House, what you hear is literally what you get. If we don't want people to ever lie to us, are we prepared to "handle the truth"?
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one who doesn't agree that lying is morally wrong? Even if it's not to save a life, a certain amount of lying is built into our societal structure for a reason. Just like altruism or other admirable human traits stem from the evolutionary necessity of smoothing tensions in population groups for the sake of ensuring the survival of future generations, so is lying.
ReplyDeleteI'm not of the belief that these traits fall on purely moral/immoral lines. And, I'm also not of the belief that they stem purely from biological necessity. And, if you haven't guessed... I'm also not of the belief that there is an "Absolute Truth." And if there were, I doubt I'd be capable of comprehending it completely in my limited human mind; I tend to accept that the answers to questions like, "What is the Absolute Truth?" are only known by a higher power.
I incorrectly assumed that the "House vs. Christian" statement would kept in the strict context of lying being a sin. I did not mean to say that I believe Dr House to a "christian role model" by any stretch of the imagination...OR....maybe I did mean it and I'm simply trying to avoid appearing as an outcast in this little group. Wow...this is the best rabbit hole I have ever been down! :-)
ReplyDeleteJason: I believe that it is empathy in most cases that we use to justify our lies. It's the "Oh, your hair looks great" (except that it looks like you were attacked by rabid monkeys!), or "Sorry, I didn't even see you standing there" (because it makes me physically ill to even look to you!). We lie to protect our little self-perceived shelters of polite mannerisms, and socially accepted exchanges.
On the subject of lying to protect someone's life...now we are delving into an entirely different realm of discussion, and one which requires the insertion of both absolute truth and absolute faith (which I might add, none of us is capable of) ...and this is also where I will most likely lose the crowd! How do you know it wasn't God's intention for that family to die? If all sin is equally abominable in God's eyes, and lying is the same as killing someone; then you would be just as sinful by lying, as the Nazi would be for killing the family.
I'll admit that I would certainly lie...as much as it took to prevent the death of anyone, BUT...I would still be commiting an act of sin, that could only be justified through man's eyes. Oddly enough, I would be very proud of that lie standing before the throne. I wonder if God would give me a wink and a smile, and say "kid, I would have done the same thing!", or would he tell me that I had interfered with his devine purpose?
Didn't mean to go all "theology" on you guys, but someone had to say it! ;-)
-NOT Ed
To Amanda R.: would you consider lying amoral - with our intent and consequences creating morality/immorality? Just trying to understand your position.
ReplyDeleteAmanda R.
ReplyDeleteYou know that i base my own morality on the principles of the Bible. But even that aside, i do not find it beneficial to lie....at all.
If we lie to others, then we lie to ourselves. We limit the potential of relationships and prevent others from trusting us. That's how it seems to me.
Now, some have alluded (i hope i used the right form there) that if you say, "how do you like my hair?" and i hate it...and i say "wow! what a cut! when did you do that?" that i'm lying. I disagree.
Unless it is understood that i have told the WHOLE TRUTH, i have no problem with withholding information.
For example,just because you ask me how my day is, and i say, "It's been up and down," and i don't tell you that my dad's in the hospital, my dog died, and i'm facing bankruptcy, but breakfast was good, and i'm looking forward to my favorite t.v. show tonight....that i don't tell you the details -- doesn't mean that i lied to you.
Certain details are appropriate for certain conversations and certain relationships. Tact, in my opinion, does not have to be untruthful, just compassionate.
You said that a certain amount of lying is built into our society. To me, that is a major part of what is wrong with our society, and i dislike it. No matter how much it hurts, i would always rather have you tell me the truth than to lie to me or deceive me.
As for absolute truth, that definition gets a little abstract to me. I believe there is absolute right and wrong. I agree that absolute truth is only truly understood by our Creator. If i thought that i truly understood all of this completely, i wouldn't believe in God anymore - because i would assume i must be smarter than He is
Wow! That was probably a lot more than 125 words. =)
Beth, I think we come from such varying perspectives that it's hard to reconcile the two... For instance, I believe (to address Jason's question) that most of what we consider morals are social constructs that allow a bunch of mammals to live together on large population groups. It's the same reason we have laws... To me, in essence "Thou shall not kill," serves the same function as laws against homicide. They are both rules god, our evolutionary subconsciousnesses (is that a word?), or whatever put in place so our species could thrive. In this framework, lying is merely a social tool.
ReplyDelete